Listen, the truth is, I do see a few potentially compatible guys who meet certain specifications of mine; goal oriented, mature, good height, cute, God-fearing, tactful and a charmer with a good sense of humor. Yes, they have these qualities but, that's at first until the push comes to shove, then they turn out not to be as handsome as they first appeared.
I had an experience once; while doing what we single ladies often do; partying with friends. I saw a man at a party; he was young and handsome, looked like he had the required specification of my brand of man. Of course, I went on to ask my friend if he was cute. And she, being her naughty self went to cajole my subject of fancy, giving him the precious gift of a group of digits making up my phone numbers.
Its a beautiful day, and I know this cos I heard his deep voice and automatically, I start to think of our babies already; from the deep voice to his finely chiseled face ...I am sold already. Texts kept going back and forth on iMessage at every hour of the day, any chance we got. With each time we spoke, the voice kept producing mini-me(s) and I could literally feel them on my insides; all I had to do was wait for the day the father will show up, and all is set in stone.
This day I was experiencing a beautiful sunset, and my baby daddy’s voice was like the icing on my cake, my phone. “Can I take you to the movies?”, he asked...and I said "No". I guess we can chuck it up to a woman's silent plea, to be begged to accept what she actually wants. After a little smooth talking, I reluctantly said to accept his movie date invite. Just when I was almost sold on the movie to see, the conversationalist in me whispered, “No, don't do movies...you wouldn’t have the opportunity to talk much, opt for dinner instead”. I listened.
I agreed with my alter ego; my best buddy, I always listen to her. So I sent him a message, “Hey handsome, I think dinner will be better” and his reply was swift, “Get dressed, I’d be at your gate, 9pm”. Excited and blushing in lovely vibes, I wore one of my best yet simple dresses, and had the lightest makeup on, just so he could see the queen and appreciate my glass like skin and fairy tale beauty.
8:30 pm and the baby daddy appears at the gate. What a plus! He's punctual. I picked up my purse, dabbed my best perfume, slipped into my stilettos and ready to mesmerize him with unconscious seduction. I headed for the car and on getting there he never bothered to open the car door for me. A first misstep I decided to overlook considering good mood I was enjoying; it's easy to accept that everyone should have a second chance at a first impression in this state. Isn't it?
We rode into Lekki in Lagos city traffic, headed to a lovely restaurant with a table reserved for two; while at it, he threw me a line I had definitely not heard before, and I laughed so hard, he must have felt proud of himself. You know what they say about getting a girl to laugh on the first date?
We got to the restaurant and the valet took over his car as we walked in. It was a beautiful restaurant but I had no intuition this was a terrible idea. I am the diet kinda girl, so I don't eat at a certain time except for salads, and meanwhile, just before he picked me up, I already treated myself to Semo and Afang soup (Nigerian delicacy) prepared by the chef in me. I wasn't ready for an extra bulge out of my dress. So I ordered a cocktail instead and he went on his meal.
We got talking and boom, out of nowhere, he asked me the last time I had sex. And I thought, like "how dare you? What effrontery?" As if that wasn't enough, he goes on to when I'd get around to visiting him. "Hello, Prince of Lagos; where's your charm?" "You barely just met me!" I went on to give him the suggestive stare like “you stupid or something?”. After this, there was no place to hide my disgust; I just kept looking at the time and looking forward to being back on my lovely bed.
Fast forward to the drive home, he says he would love to see me again, and being the petty me, I said I had the worse first date and wasn’t exactly looking forward to another and he goes, “Are you for real? What did I do wrong?”, Can I fix it? I pointed them out and he attempted to give reasons. "Just shut up and apologize", I thought to myself. Why defend such a plain stupid ungentlemanly act?
In retrospect, I'll say
GUYS TRY TO AVOID SEXUAL CONVERSATION ON A FIRST DATE, EXCEPT The conversation MUTUALLY find its way there.
As for my single LADIES: DO NOT TOLERATE DEROGATORY STATEMENTS OR CONVERSATIONS, AND AVOID ANY GUY WHO APPEARS NOT TO HAVE RESPECT FOR YOU AND IS LACKING IN COURTESY and expected gentleman MANNERS.
xoxo
- 09:42:00
- 6 Comments
